The Conical Glass: Getting to & being in New York: a two part entry

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Getting to & being in New York: a two part entry

Once again, I am coming to you from an airplane, although this trip has the slight advantage over my last one in that I was not hit in the head by falling luggage. As I write this, we're still two hours away from our destination (JFK Airport in New York) and you know what? I'm fine with that. This flight is perfectly OK, mainly because we were able to use frequent flier miles to upgrade to business class. Also, I read a self-help book last night called Flying Without Fear and have been trying to remember all of its principles. I'm wearing a rubber band around the palm of my hand, which I'm supposed to snap if I find myself getting frightened. I have also memorized the mantra "It's a comfort issue, not a safety issue" (which you're supposed to repeat to yourself when there's turbulence) and the various breathing and relaxation exercises. I'm wearing my noise-canceling headphones and listening to soothing music (Jose Gonzalez). Yes, I'm doing fine.

I often think I would be perfectly happy flying long distances if I could have log on to the internet on the plane. But if we had internet access, does that mean people would also be able to chat on their cell phones? Because that would suck. Our plane was two hours late taking off, and I spent an agonizing half hour at the gate overhearing loud cell phone chatter. One guy, a well-dressed young business type in his 20s, apparently decided to take advantage of the delay by calling every person in his directory, even folks he hadn't talked to in months. "What's up?" he asked one of them. "I'm chillin' and I'm illin', like we do in the 'hood," said the guy, who seemed like an ex-frat boy, NOT someone who grew up in the 'hood. Gag.

Flying in biz class offers me the priceless opportunity to observe the American class system in action, which is something I've long been fascinated by. You might think you're at the top of the heap because you're flying business, you're not back there with the rest of the hoi polloi, but then you realize there's always someone higher up than you are. For instance, for domestic flights, you're only allowed to access the Red Carpet Club if you're in FIRST class, not business. There are twelve first-class seats at the very front of the plane and their chairs probably recline further back or something. They might get fancier food -- we had a choice of grilled chicken, pan-seared beef tenderloin or pasta Alfredo -- and better wines.

But even in business class, there's a hierarchy. Flight attendants get a list of all the passengers and how they paid for their ticket. Folks like us, who used miles to upgrade, are the lowest on the business-class totem pole. I noticed that even though we're in the second row, the flight attendant asked several other passengers for their entree choices before coming back to us. If you paid full fare, you shouldn't get gypped out of the beef tenderloin if that's what you really want!

The thing about playing the status game is that it's unwinnable. I recently read an article about status handbags that said some wealthy Manhattanites are paying up to $50,000 for the latest hot, limited-edition bag; $1,000 bags are considered far too common. But even if you buy a $50K handbag, how many times can you be seen in public with it before your friends start to roll their eyes at the very sight of it?

The captain has turned on the fasten seat belt sign. It's a comfort issue, not a safety issue!

The most crucial part of flying is always making sure you have the right book along. I already had seven books picked out for the trip (yeah, that sounds insane, and I do realize there are bookstores in New York, but it's a comfort issue...) and then I found an eighth on the Friends of the Library sale shelf yesterday -- Lee Child's Persuader, which I bought for a dollar. He's one of those authors I've been meaning to check out for a long time, and his books are always lauded as page-turners. Having read the first 150 pages of Persuader, I strongly recommend Lee Child for airplane trips. The book is extremely hardboiled and action-packed. How can you worry about a little thing like turbulence when Jack Reacher is getting shot at by bad guys?

So, yeah, everything's cool. But it would have been cooler if I'd remembered to rip the Fujiya & Miyagi album for my iPod before leaving.

P.S. to any of my clients who might be reading this. I realize I sent out an email that said I was going to have no internet access for two whole weeks. For months, I thought that was the case. I envisioned staying away from my computer and coming back home and finding eight hundred unread emails and it made me feel all angsty inside. Then I found out that the place we're staying is supposed to have internet access after all, so we brought the laptop with us. But I'm going to try my best not to work. Even the self-employed deserve an occasional break.

OK, I am now on the ground -- well, on the sixth floor of our hotel in New York. As it turned out, the "two hours" until arrival turned into about three and a half, since bad weather at the airport prevented us from landing on schedule and forced the plane to go around and around in circles. We finally got into JFK at 1:15 AM and made it to our hotel at 2:30. The whole thing would have been nightmarish if we'd been in coach. In business, we got to choose from a box of flavored chocolate truffles. (What did they get in first? An entire box of chocolates each?) I was able to read 150 more pages of Persuader and really, getting in so late didn't matter much, since we were still on West Coast time.

Today, we went to a matinee of "Frost/Nixon," an excellent new play by Peter Morgan, whom we'd seen interviewed at the San Francisco International Film Festival. I was particularly excited to see Michael Sheen, who was so terrific as Tony Blair in "The Deal" and "The Queen." He was equally fantastic as Frost, and Frank Langella is amazing as Nixon. The play made me curious about the real Frost/Nixon interviews -- we found some snippets on YouTube. Apparently some of the play is true, and other parts are made up, such as a climactic drunken phone call from Nixon to Frost on the eve of their interview about Watergate. One thing that bugged me a little bit was that Nixon was such a card. Did he even have a sense of humor? The onstage Nixon is downright hilarious at times.

After "Frost/Nixon," we ambled over to Hell's Kitchen, which sounds far rougher than it actually is, and attended a taping of "The Colbert Report." Not only was it awesome but I GOT TO SHAKE STEPHEN'S HAND. He was kind of in a hurry so I didn't have a chance to chat with him, but that's OK, because I'm sure I would have just said something dumb. Then we went to my favorite Thai restaurant, Chanpen, for dinner. Eventually we got back to the hotel and I had to wash the hand Stephen had touched, darn the luck.

I always have such a fun time in New York. I could never live here, because it's too noisy and crowded, but it's one of the greatest places in the world to visit.

posted by 125records @ 9:08 PM

3 Comments:

At 9:39 PM, Josh said…

Hey Sue, are ya gonna stay up late and come to the ROFL show Friday night, huh huh huh? PLEEZE? I gotta pack the place with partisans!

I got bumped up to business class because coach was full when I was flying transatlantic (Munich-Dulles) once and it made it really, really hard to go back. Especially when you're six feet tall, it's just so nice to be able to stretch out on a long flight like that. The guy in the row behind me was wearing an all-white sailing outfit, complete with boat shoes, a captain's hat, and a red ascot. It was if he was going to step off the plane and immediately onto his enormous yacht.

Josh
At 9:42 PM, 125records said…

Josh, not only are we coming, we already have our tickets! See ya' on Friday!
At 4:00 PM, Flying without Fear.com said…

Hi
at flyingwithoutfear.com you can download loads of useful stuff that you can take into the air with you. We will be adding another 20 free videos to the site this week coming.
We're the biggest help resource in the world.

Keith