The Conical Glass: Prince

Monday, January 25, 2010

Prince

I'm not a big fan of the NFL -- to me, Sundays are better spent catching up with the past week's worth of Go Fug Yourself posts and doing the crosswords -- but Joe always enjoys watching the games, so they're always on in our house. Yesterday featured a match-up between the New Orleans Saints and the Minnesota Vikings. The winner would go to the Super Bowl.

Logically, I didn't have a horse in this race; I have no connection to New Orleans, and I've only been to Minnesota once. However, I rooted fiercely for the Saints, for one reason: Prince wrote the world's worst song about the Vikings in honor of their playoff run. If the team won, that means the song would get additional exposure. This would result in the death of music.

In case you missed the song, it is called "Purple and Gold" and the lyrics are written in Prince's trademark, proto-text-messaging style:

all of the odds r in r favor
no prediction 2 bold
we r the truth if the truth can b told
long reign the purple and gold

As for the melody, ESPN's Dan Le Batard called it "dreadful," adding that "if anyone other than Prince wrote this song, they would look at it in the Vikings’ offices, begin braying with laughter, and then throw it away." Tony Kornheiser compared it to "the songs they used to play in the old Soviet Union when the tanks marched by."

Ross Raihala at TwinCities.com bravely called his home team's new anthem "decidedly unfunky," stating it "just lumbers along like that musty old fight song your alma mater drags out at homecoming events."

I think it's what "The Internationale" would sound like if it was arranged for a merry-go-round calliope. It's enough to make me nostalgic for the days of the "Super Bowl Shuffle."

Fortunately, the Vikings lost the game in overtime, and it is hoped that "Purple and Gold" will be relegated to the dustbin of history.

On Saturday, Joe and I went to see "Weird Al" Yankovic at San Francisco's Sketchfest. We usually attend at least a couple of Sketchfest events each year, and always wind up wishing we could go to many more. The event was billed as "Sitting and Talking with 'Weird Al' Yankovic," and indeed, it was not a concert, but a conversation (with comedian Chris Hardwick, a friend and fan of Al) about the musical satirist's life and career. The topic of Prince came up -- he is one of the few musicians who has always refused to give Al permission to parody his songs -- and Yankovic regaled the crowd with a story about the Purple One.

In the mid-80s, Al was nominated for an award -- I think it was the Grammy nod for "Eat It," but I wasn't taking notes and can't recall the exact details. He was thrilled to be attending the ceremony, and learned that he was going to be sitting in the same row as Prince. How exciting it must have been for a young musician to be seated in such close proximity to one of the biggest stars in the world!

Then Al received a telegram -- this was a long time ago, remember -- stating that it was very important that he not make eye contact with Prince. How did Yankovic respond? He sent back a telegram announcing that Prince would not be permitted to look him in the eyes. Check and mate, my friend. Check and mate.

I had always heard stories about celebrities requesting that no one may look them in the eye, but I sort of hoped they were urban legends. Anyway, Al is cooler than Prince will ever be, and if he wrote a song for a football team, I'm sure it would kick butt, and make you laugh.

posted by 125records @ 5:42 PM

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